fall lovers

i held your hand for the first time,

afraid you would hate the fuzz growing

just above my knuckles.

the night was too warm for the closing of September, ignited

by the messily-aligned stars—

my palms dripped

with the fear of driving you away.

it was like biting into a lemon dusted with sugar—

my teeth ached right down

to the chambers of my heart.

we rolled through the nights like squirrels barreling through piles of leaves—

every time i squirmed away

you nestled closer,

your hands like that song

we used to murmur,

trembling in the cold.

i am trying to memorize the shape

of your hands

in my hands—

i ache as i picture my nose, my ears growing out of my face—

my two hands warmed by no one.